Scott SimpsonSongs, Poems, Stories.

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Ballad of Donald

Scott Simpson

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Song information

Release years and genres refer to the catalogued recordings. Composition credits follow Apple Music; separate writer credits follow the supplied lyric sources.

Credit sources

Lyrics

One day old Donald He was chewin’ on a Big Mac Up in the tower like a golden haired nic-nac Jr said pops you gotta take on the big time Donald said, yes... but not on my dime! Not on my dime! Not on my dime! So he worked out a presidential Escalator scene Just to launch his plan to burn through Some public green Said something ‘bout some rapists And a southern wall And won a ticket to the White House From the whitest folks of all! The whitest folks of all! The whitest folks of all! Yeah, I’m cleaning up the dump— Not worried ‘bout subpoenas Evangelicals are pumped I’ll ship the aliens to Venus Got the Democrats stumped With presidential obsceneness I’m Donald J. Trump And the J. stands for Jenius. He launched a Twitter-fied spat With the Rocket Man Emptied bureau offices All across the land Said the coal would flow But the solar he’d tax Don’t need no science When you’re making up the facts. Yeah makin’ up facts... Alternative facts. Now he wants a parade To show off his tanks He’d improve his image more With a new set of Spanx Now he owes the House Republicans A big old thanks For the war on intelligence Instead of Russian banks. What Russian banks? Oh yeah, thanks! Yeah, I’m cleaning up the dump— Not worried ‘bout subpoenas Evangelicals are pumped I’ll ship the aliens to Venus Got the Democrats stumped With presidential obsceneness I’m Donald J. Trump And the J. stands for Jenius. Yeah, I’m cleaning up the dump— Not worried ‘bout subpoenas Evangelicals are pumped I’ll ship the aliens to Venus Got the Democrats stumped With presidential obsceneness I’m Donald J. Trump And the J. stands for Jenius.

Source: ScottSimpsonAllLyrics (2).pdf · pp. 37–39

Albums & listening

Live, remastered, and alternate arrangements may differ from the supplied lyrics.

Recording details (1)
Gravitate · Ballad of DonaldListen on Apple Music

Song story & origins

Introduction

In 2018 I was unusually productive musically and unusually frustrated politically. Early that year I released A. Dream (short for “American Dream,” a nod to the inaugural claim that “the American dream is dead”). Late that year I released Gravitate. Between those two records sit three songs that speak directly to Donald J. Trump: one deadly serious (A. Dream) and two satirical (TrumpFunk and The Ballad of Donald).

I knew I’d have to face these sooner or later, and I decided to simply present them and read the words aloud, because the verses can move fast. I don’t want this to become a polemic; I want the lyrics to speak, then move on. Still, the moment matters. As I drafted this, we were at the end of the first wave of public impeachment hearings. I don’t know whether a second wave will come, but I do know this much: when you’re an artist and you’re frustrated or angry, you channel it into the work—music, painting, sculpture, speaking—so it might do someone else some good. That’s true no matter where you stand politically. And if we’re listening to one another, we can receive work we don’t fully agree with, consider it, and be better for the engagement.

For my part, the frustration rose from what I understood to be a pattern: pressure on Ukraine’s new president to open a debunked investigation into a political rival; earlier Mueller findings around collusion and obstruction; decades of documented business controversies and lawsuits; multiple allegations of sexual misconduct. To say “no collusion, no quid pro quo, no bribery” without looking at the full picture felt disingenuous to me. These three songs all predate the impeachment process itself but come from that same disquiet.

One craft note: wherever the “speaker” in a verse is the president himself, I sing it straight. I don’t attempt an impersonation—that would distract from the song.

Why these three sit together

Because they trace one year of work and one argument: satire’s sting (TrumpFunk, Ballad) and a straight-on lament (A. Dream). The larger invitation is the same one I gave myself while the hearings rolled: do the work. Make the thing. Don’t just stew—create. Then listen well to others who are making, even if it’s not your view.

A bluegrass-leaning send-up patterned after “The Ballad of Jed Clampett.” A friend showed me a bumper-sticker/meme hook; I thanked him and wrote the song.

Notes

A satirical ballad of the brand, the escalator entrance, the wall, alt-facts, the parade, the unblushing boasts. I also cut a video for this one.

Source: New Music Memoir (1).docx

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